


Faded Love

by bakatenshi



Category: Free!
Genre: Angst, Bottom!Rin, M/M, NSFW, Top!Haru
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-25
Updated: 2014-05-30
Packaged: 2018-01-26 10:29:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 16,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1685075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bakatenshi/pseuds/bakatenshi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Haruka and Rin were together in high school but somehow faded apart. What will happen when years later they are both back in Iwatobi?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, I am Angela aka rpHaruka on tumblr. This is from a roleplay I have on tumblr with r-matsuoka. We like the story so much that we wanted to share it.

The night air carried by the wind, it was a cool breeze and it was blowing those rouge waves . Haru saw him across the road, walking with someone and laughing. His blood red eyes were lite up and he looked so good. So handsome. He looks so happy now., you would think our past never even took place.

He can remember it like it was yesterday. High school sweethearts going off to college, promising to stay in touch. But somehow, it had all gone wrong. It had all fallen apart. He had tried to move on but it wasn’t working, time was not on his side.

\--

It hasn’t been long since Rin had returned to Iwatobi. After graduating, his mother suggested to come back and start searching for a job nearby. He decided to give it a try, part of it because he missed Iwatobi but… another big part of it was because he blindly hoped to meet Haruka after all these years. People could maintain friendships from high school, it was not that difficult. Yet, what he once had with Haruka was not… just a friendship. He once loved Haruka. No… he, he was still in love with him.

Trying to leave those memories a side, Rin decided to concentrate in his new friends, in his new life, in his whole world where Haruka… was no longer part of it.

That’s what he was doing that night, deciding to go out with one of his friends to that club everybody was talking about. As he laughed, he swears he felt someone staring at him. Unconsciously, he raised his gaze and met with a pair of blue eyes he could never forget.

He gulped. “Haru…” 

He was not ready for this.

\--

Haru was in his own little world and he didn’t notice that Rin had seen him. He was dwelling on the past in his mind, wishing he hadn’t seen him. The familiar pain it created and the longing for what once was. Painful nostalgia.

He turned on his heel and headed in the opposite direction, away from him. Away from the reminder of the pain. He could still remember what it felt like to kiss those lips so long ago. To hold that hand, to look deep into those eyes and to swim together. He cherished those memories but he also dreaded them because of the heartache they brought with them.

After dragging his feet because of his inner musings, he finally arrived home and headed to bed immediately.He longed for sleep and the peace he hoped it would bring.

\--

All these years running away from Haruka’s memories to be drag once again by the same spider web. It never mattered what Rin ever tried to do, it was not even possible to forget about him. Haruka was always in every thought that crossed his mind, in every action or decision he took… Rin couldn’t take Haruka out of his head.

And then, after all these years, he finally get to see him across the street, thinking that maybe destiny wanted them to finally reunite. But all his hopes were scarred in small pieces when Haruka walked away, as if they haven’t seen each other.

His friend noticed Rin’s sudden mood change and asked if there was something wrong. Rin denied everything and went to that bar to get him drowned in beer. He got completely drunk that night, thinking that maybe it was an horrible idea to live in Iwatobi if… Haruka was still around and not with him.

\--

It had been a week since he had gazed upon what was once his reason for breathing. He had dragged his feet all week as his mind was sucked back in time. Reminiscing the good and the bad of once was.

He couldn’t shake how happy Rin had looked and how he had moved on without Haru. Granted when Haru was around others, no one had a clue to his inner pain. His heart felt like it was missing the key. His love locked inside and unable to escape. Rin was the one that got away and the one he would always long for.

After so much time, he just—— when it was at its best, that love was so profound that he missed it and it cut deep that one person can move on—- while the other is stuck and just can’t.

He was currently at the grocery store and as he looked up, his eyes fell on him. How is it that he was seeing him again? He didn’t need this constant reminder like this. This town felt entirely too small. He moved his eyes down to the fish and began to browse for just the right one. He would just have to pretend that he had not seen the redhead.

\--

Living by himself at college, Rin was forced to learn how to cook and develop himself inside the kitchen. Even if he didn’t actually like it, he admitted to himself it was an easy way to keep his mind occupied and away from Haruka for at least an hour.

Ever since he spotted him across the streets that night, his thoughts and dreams were once again pure chaos. Rin was trying harder to keep himself busy 24/7. That evening, he volunteered on cooking dinner for his mother and sister; that was the reason he was out there. Carrying a basket full of diverse ingredients across the aisle, Rin stopped midway to grab a can of corn from the rack.

And there’s when he spotted him once more. There he was; Haruka. Was the world mocking him?! The odds of finding him once more in such a short time were illogical but here they were… so close to each other this time.

Rin lick his lower lip; his body moving by itself toward Haruka, just like bees are attracted to bees. He… needed to hear his voice, to… touch him once more.

Placing his hand on Haruka’s shoulder he called his name.

“Is… that you, Haru?”

\--

Haru froze —- stiff, like his body had forgotten how to move. He was hallucinating right? He didn’t hear ‘that’ voice. It sent a familiar chill up his spine, the way his name rolled off of those lips was too much to take,

He had to get away, he could pretend he hadn’t heard him, couldn’t he? He didn’t — no he couldn’t deal with this.

His mind played tricks on him, reminding him of things that he so wanted to forget. Like how warm the arms of the other boy used to feel. How he had cute habits that only Haru knew or used to be the only one who knew,

After all, after all this time - it was possible Rin had had or does have another relationship. Haru however was so stuck in the past. He had not touched any one else and he had not even wanted to bother with such things .He was too aware of the pain once it ended to bother jumping in in the first place.

\--

Rin’s hand remained on his shoulder, feeling Haruka’s warm skin through the fabric. Being this close to the raven-head made Rin’s whole world paralyze; they were so close to each other that Rin could smell Haruka’s shampoo and the hint of mackerel scent on his clothes. When was the last time Rin felt Haru’s skin under his?

“It is definitely you!” Rin confirmed, hiding the love that wanted to come out of his lips as soft words. He smiled, pretending he was a good friend, pretending he was not in love with him. “Can’t believe you’re still here at Iwatobi! How have you been?!”

\--

There it was again that voice and he had been so lost in thought that he almost hadn’t noticed that Rin was touching his shoulder, How long had he just stood there zoned out, off in his own little world of thought?

He slowly reached up and removed that hand from his shoulder. This was the past that he was too afraid to face. Sure he thought about it alone constantly….but seeing Rin made it all too real. Like a knife slicing at his heart.

He turned to face Rin but only to walk past him to the check out stand, forgetting the rest of his groceries. Too focused on leaving to even care.

\--

“What…?”, Rin whispered as Haruka walked past him, leaving him behind with words still on his mouth. The redhead was shocked, following Haru with his gaze until he left the store. Did Haru really just… ignore him? Rin’s hands turned into tight fists, his pride had just been hurt.

Heating up by the whole situation, Rin left his basket on the floor and went after Haruka in full speed. As he exited the store, he ignored the eyes he got on his back from all the curious customers that witnessed their entire encounter.

“Wait up!” he warned, running as fast as he could after Haruka. “Hey! What’s your problem?! I said wait!”

\--

Haru exited the store after checking out and started walking home. To see him across the store was one thing but for him to get so near like that. He couldn’t breath until he was a little ways away from the store.

He heard a commotion not realizing it was because of someone on his tail, Rin. He didn’t pay any heed to it and kept walking.

Ignoring Rin back there had not been easy, it had took all the power he could muster up. If he let him in—- he would just lose him all over again. There wasn’t any point to bring the past into the present.

Even though in his reality somehow he was still in the past.

\--

Once outside, he spotted Haruka not too far from him and Rin’s feet stopped moving. The redhead stood there, frozen on his spot, without being able to take his eyes away from the boy he still loved. Haruka continued walking away, as if he was pretending Rin didn’t existed or maybe… making it clear that, for him, Rin was not worth to be noticed.

It hurts Rin, his heart felt on fire, but this was exactly the reason why he and Haruka never work out together. Haruka… didn’t have time for someone like Rin.

Rin bit his lower lip hard, his pride hurt, and his feet went back running to Haruka. How dare him to ignore him like that?!

“Hey, Haru!” He yelled. “Wait up! I am talking to you! What’s your damn problem!?”

\--

Haru was on a more isolated street now so it was clear as he heard his name being yelled that Rin had followed him. He had to do something so the shark would give up already. Had it not been clear that he couldn’t handle any of this?

He still had no desire to see the swimmer he once loved with everything that he is, hell he still felt that way. Who was he kidding? Only himself.

It had been so long he could hardly remember why they had lost touch, how they had lost touch… it was like college life had consumed his time back then so much that sadly he could never find time for Rin and it seemed when he was available Rin was the one who was busy. It was hard to maintain and it just evaporated like air.

They stopped calling each other, stopped emailing stopped everything. Or at least this was how it was in Haru’s perception but at times two people see the same situation completely different.

He could still not bring himself to stop and talk to Rin even if the redhead was literally chasing him down. Why would he go to so much trouble? Surely someone as strong as Rin could move on or maybe Haru was just being a fool. He didn’t think that though, he was so focused on dwelling on his pain —- it was a little ridiculous really to outsiders who tried to look in.

\--

Haruka seemed so distracted, so deep in thoughts, that Rin took that into advantage and reduced the distance between them. He reached his arm, stopping him from running away, pulling him into the dark alley as they passed, and abruptly pushed him up against a fence.

Rin’s heart was beating so hard against his chest, he barely was able to breath, gasping for air he had lost while chasing the dolphin. He locked Haruka against the fence with one arm on each side of his head.

And there’s when their eyes met for the very first time… being this close.

“What’s… your deal?!”

\--

Haru was taken out of his thoughts abruptly and downright shocked at what a hothead Rin was being. He found himself being grabbed by his arm and pulled into a secluded alley — and then pressed against a fence. What few groceries he carried were now decorating the road.

The eyes before him, they were piercing into him, Haru’s own eyes could not look away — not when he was this close. It was like he was screaming ‘here I am notice me god damn you’.

He looked so good still, it wasn’t fair. How can someone look so damn good and make you miss them so damn much? Why the fuck did he still care about this guy? What is it about him that sucks Haruka in?

Haru took in that face and his eyes barely swaying as he kept his emotions to himself. He didn’t want Rin to know that he missed him. He didn’t want it to be written on his face. He didn’t want him to know that no one had or could ever take his place in Haru’s heart.

"What do you want?" His tone was calm, his question blunt.

\--

Haruka had always been so expressionless, but this time it really bothered Rin more than he had ever wanted. It seemed like if Haru thought that if dealing with Rin was such a hassle. Rin felt so irritated, deeply offended.

“What do I want?” He asked sarcastically. “Well, I don’t know. Maybe for you to stop being some damn rude and answer back when I talk to you.”

Rin was still blocking Haru’s way out.

\--

Haru breathed in deep, his heart can’t take much of this, with this close proximity — it was pounding so hard it almost caused pain. He wanted to look away from those eyes, they were filled with anger and maybe a hint of frustration.

He closed his eyes as a deep sigh escaped from his throat, “I can’t think straight with you this close to me….” I can’t deal with this…. He opened his eyes once more, “What is there to talk about?” Eyes lock on Rin’s once more - a serious look on his face as he hide how he really felt.

If he was honest, he wanted to forget the past hardship and run into the arms that were currently blocking him…but—- so much doubt filled his heart.

\--


	2. Part 2

Haruka’s words made Rin realize how invasive he had been, how their noses were slightly touching each other and how wrong it felt now to be this close to the man that once was his. How come in the past he felt so comfortable by being this close to Haruka and now… it felt like if it was forbidden?

Haruka was just like water; you can last longer without drinking water than without food but… sooner or later it will end up killing you. Rin knew it, without him… he would end up dying from this pain inside his chest.

Even if he tried to hide those sour thoughts and prevent them to reflect pain in his crimson eyes, he decided to drop his arms and take a step backwards just to give the other more space to think. Or maybe… he was the one that needed space to think and process everything inside his head.

“I used to think there was nothing to talk about us, Haru.” Rin replied, eyes still on his. “But now I even started wondering that maybe you don’t think of me even as friends like I thought you did all this time.”

Why would Haru run away from him like that? Why would Haruka avoid him? Was he mad… because Rin started ignoring him and becoming distant years ago?

\--

Friends? He wants to be friends? That was what this was about? Haru continued a blank stare at Rin, he was trying his damnedest to read what was in his eyes if that was possible. For a brief moment he wondered if he was hallucinating because those eyes looked like Rin was in pain, but it was brief. Perhaps they were both good at hiding it.

"Friends?" Could Haru’s heart take being friends with this person, the one that got away. The one that caused such a whirlwind of mixed emotions, good and bad, Wanting to run and wanted to grab onto him.

His blue eyes scanned Rin’s features intensely. What the hell is he supposed to say to this? He could breath more once the other boy gave him some space, he wanted to run away again but he hesitated.

"I just don’t know—-" Just being friends is hard. Seeing your face is hard. This whole situation is just so hard to deal with. His heart raced do to being confronted like this. Rin was as hotheaded and as passionate as ever. At least he had not tried to kiss Haru or the dolphin may have wavered.

Finally he looked away and turned on his heal Once more walking away from the most important person in his heart.

\--

“You don’t know?!” But any other word pretending to be said died on his lips when Haruka started to walk away. Rin reminded speechless, entirely astonished. Was Haruka seriously trying to leave him behind? Was he really implying that Rin was not worth it even as a friend?

Rin closed his hands in tight fists. “The fuck is wrong with you, Haruka?!” he yelled. “Am I seriously not important enough for you to at least give me a god dammed explanation?!”

No, please don’t lock me out. Please let me be part of your life!

His legs started moving without thinking, going once more after Haruka while his whole body felt heavier than before. “Tell me, when did we stop being friends?!”

\--

Haru froze with every word that spilled out of Rin’s lips. He turned on his heel and faced Rin again.How was he supposed to answer such questions?

"I—-" don’t know…His heart raced just being anywhere near him. It always brought the past in, like it was demanding him to confront it head on. “Friends?” After what we used to have? Is it possible to only be friends? I can’t look at those lips and forget what a kiss from them used to be like. I can’t look at you and not want to hold you…. It just doesn’t compute that way in my head…..

"How can I tell you when I don’t even know myself?" God damn it, his fucking emotions are usually in check but being chased down and confronted over and over…..

His face felt wet as a small tear came from the corner of his eye. He turned away from Rin. “What do you want from me?” He said it so softly, his voice cracking.

\--

Rin was shocked; he had never seen Haru cry before. His mouth went completely dry; there were no words that could describe the heavy feeling inside his chest. Even if Haruka tried to hide those tears from Rin, he could still hear them on Haru’s fragile voice.

What have I done?

Rin could still remember the promises they both made time ago, promises of love, promises that linked them together and how Rin have sworn he would never break Haru’s heart again. It was hard not to start crying as well; he felt miserable and entire guilty. He had failed him…

“This is…” he stopped not entirely sure of what to say. “I want…”

I want you back. I want you to want me back…!

“Fuck.”

He lowered his face, shoulders already shaking as he tried to keep himself from crying. 

\--

Haru wiped his tears and barely pulled himself together, Rin’s tone of voice— it held something in it. He wasn’t so sure now if the redhead really had moved on as he assumed when he saw him so happy before. Was he just as unhappy as Haru had become?

He didn’t know if he should run away from those arms or directly into them. He longed for the past but he also wanted to run from it —- his love for Rin ran deep, to the core of who he is. “I—-” never got over you…

He turned around and faced the redhead and he could tell, Rin wasn’t happy. “— can’t be just your friend…” Haru’s honest words slipped out before he even realized what he was doing. He sighed heavily, he had not meant to say that out loud really. However, it needed to be said because it was too hard to just be friends with him. Or so he kept telling himself. 

\--

Too many emotions were spinning around, his guilt was overwhelming and more than he could ever handle. Rin felt sick, completely dizzy not knowing anymore what he was allowed to feel or able to do.

Then, those words rung in his ears and made his whole world stop. Rin lifted his head and stared straight into those blue eyes that were looking back at him. They can’t just be friends? Then, what was that supposed to mean?

He lost to his own heart; hurrying his way to Haruka, grabbing the front of his shirt roughly pulled him into a kiss like if his dear life depended on it. It had already been years since the last time their lips had met in this way and yet… Rin remembered perfectly how pleasant those lips felt against his. This felt so right.

\--

Haru froze at first as he was grabbed and kissed, his eyes grew wide for a moment but he had missed this feeling. He had missed those lips and the precious person they belonged to. So even if his brain was telling him to stop, his heart and his body were another story. He ended up kissing those lips back just as passionately as they were to him.

He had lost his head as his mind went blank, no thoughts of the past bothered him on this moment. No tormenting, just being. His heart slammed in his chest and thumped in his ears like they were speakers. His stomach which had been tied in knots felt light as a soft tickle filled it.

He wrapped his arms around Rin and pulled him in closer, he wanted to be closer. He never realized that it was to this extent that he missed Rin. But one kiss and suddenly he was a complete mess. No one else had ever had this kind of impact on him. No one else ever would.

The lock on his heart didn’t turn however, it wasn’t that easy with just one kiss, however it did set him at ease and he didn’t dwell on his thoughts because this guy’s kisses made him downright senseless.

\--

It took a moment for Rin’s mind to stutter awake, to adjust to the moment and distinguish between what was real and what was mere fantasy.

Haruka was kissing him back.

Rin’s long fingers caressed Haruka’s cheeks to assure that this was real, he could barely hold himself. The kiss started as a passionate, sweet kiss full of hope and unspoken promises. Rin felt his hunger roar, as if only those lips were able to bring him back to life.

Rin broke the kiss just to breathe in but their lips met once more, and between kisses, he felt his own crimson eyes now drowning in tears. How come he was able to find peace just in those lips that weren’t meant to be his?

\--

His heart sank for a moment when Rin broke the kiss but that didn’t last at all. His lips came right back for more and Haru was so caught up right now, so relieved at his agony disappearing that the physical contact was a need like some illegal drug he had to obtain.

He was panting between kisses, and his response became quite heated. It had been years since he had kissed Rin. Kissing Rin was dangerous though because he wasn’t using his brain at all. Only his heart and his physical yearning for the other male. Rin’s finger’s on his cheek were so rugged yet so gentle - the way he touched Haru sent chills down the raven’s back.

He slowly backed Rin into the fence as they kissed and cupped his face with one hand — dragging his thumb across the soft skin of the shark’s cheek.. He slowed his kisses down into a soft, loving tease - nipping at Rin’s lips and tracing his tongue over them. The light feeling in his stomach spread though his body and he grew so warm.

\--

Rin getting out of breath again, yet he managed to steal some air from Haru’s mouth as he locked his arms around the other’s hips and pulled their bodies closer. He closed his eyes drowning himself on Haruka’s scent and letting himself go. Haruka’s touch made him shiver, their lips pressed against each other, kissing like if they invented it.

A surprised moan came out of his cherry lips once his back was against the fence, yet that was not enough for Rin to even consider breaking the kiss. In fact, he remembered how he had always enjoyed when Haruka showed his thrust for dominance in their encounters. Rin’s eyes remained closed, scared that opening his eyes meant he would wake up from this unexpected dream.

It had happened before; his dreams had always felt this real.

Their tongues met after so long, dancing at their own rhythm. His whole body was on fire, not even the night’s cold air could stop Rin from sweating. He bit Haruka’s lower lip gently and wrapped his leg around the raven-head’s hips in a possessive act.

\--

Haru pressed into Rin as the redhead had pulled him closer, once he heard that moan escape Rin…he remember that familiar sound. It was like a sweet chime of a music box to his ears and he wanted to make the redhead - do that again.

His mind was completely muddled as he was consumed with Rin at the moment. He didn’t even realize that a soft damn drop had landed on his face. Slowly more began to fall from the sky. It was a light sprinkle and yet Haru paid no mind to it.

Haru let out a low groan when his lip was bit and he pushed into Rin’s body when the shark wrapped a leg around him. He was trying to be as close as possible but he reluctantly came up for air.

He didn’t stop with Rin though, oh no — he began placing slow kisses, nips and licks over the redhead’s exposed skin — from his lips to his neck. He ran his hand through Rin’s hair and gently gripped it — pulling his head back so he could access the sensitive skin of his neck better.

\--

Rin allowed those kisses on his neck, titling his head and he couldn’t hold back a grunt. Both men were now soaked; the redhead’s crimson bangs clung now to his cheeks, hands sliding down over his shoulders and down Haruka’s sides.

Fingers trace along his hips, tempting his fate and finding it way under Haruka’s wet shirt touching the forbidden skin he wanted to mark as his after so long.

Those kisses were driving him crazy, but Rin still felt unsatisfied. He had always been a man that liked things rough; bites and scratches, whatever was able to leave marks on his body as a constant reminder that he belonged to Haruka.

Rin felt on Haruka’s spell, blindfolded by the pleasure he could only find in the other’s lips. 

\--

Haru could feel how soaked his body was from the rain, but this only served to fuel his desire that much more. As he licked and kissed Rin’s neck — he settled on a spot determined to leave a mark. He first placed soft licks over the skin, the chilled rain - against Rin’s hot skin. He loved the smell of Rin mixed with the rain. It was sensual in its own way. He stopped licking and went to slowly sucking on the spot. His hand slipping from Rin’s hair and running slowly down his back. 

He could feel Rin’s hands tracing his body and creeping under his shirt, his breath was caught in his throat as he felt the soft touch on his bare skin. It sent shivers through him in a very intimate way. He stopped his assault on Rin’s neck and looked him in the eyes.

He didn’t speak but he started to slowly unbutton his own shirt as he gazed intensely at Rin, his eyes half lidded and laced with longing. Please don’t speak. Don’t ruin this moment.

\--

Rin could feel the raindrops running down from Haruka’s nose bridge, falling directly on his neck and rolling down his chest. Those lips felt so warm against his neck, intoxicating him with their lustful licks. Rin couldn’t hide how pleasurable it felt once Haru started sucking his neck, hoping he could leave a mark big enough for him to remember this sensual encounter.

Their eyes met and Rin took this chance to appreciate Haruka’s red lips, swollen from the previous kissed they had shared under the rain. No words, Haruka worked on his own shirt and Rin licked his lower lip with desire. If you say a word, the spell will be broken and we will be forced to part ways once more.

His hands joined the others, taking that unnecessary wet shirt off their way unable to control the thirst flowing through his veins. Haruka’s skin had always been this pale, so white and irresistible in his eyes. Rin came forward and hid his face on Haru’s neck, blinding each of his senses with Haruka’s sweet scent.

His hands wondered on Haruka’s back, marking their way down that hot skin. He bit him; digging his teeth slowly on Haru’s skin. His tongue met with the skin he trapped between his teeth, tasting like a salty sweet candy that made him want more.

\--

As Haru was working on his shirt, his eyes took in the sight before him, because Rin’s clothes were hugging his taunt muscular frame. He had never looked sexier - his rouge locks sticking to him as water dripped off of them. He savored this image, he would be sure to reflect on it later.

He wasn’t surprised at all when Rin assisted him with the removal of his shirt, once it was off he could feel the cool rain hit his heated skin. Normally he may be chilled in such a situation but at the moment his body was on fire.

He could feel Rin’s warm breath on his neck, there was a slight spark that ran through him just from this and this alone. The spark was now a multitude of small shocks racing over his skin as he felt Rin’s hands on his bare flesh. His heartbeat rang in his ears and he gasped softly once those sharp teeth bit down. It wasn’t hard enough to cause him to bleed but he did feel a slight pain mixed with pleasure. Rin had a way of pushing his buttons. He grabbed onto Rin’s shirt and pulled him closer as he gently jerked it up and snuck his hands underneath, tracing over the dampened skin with his fingertips and then his nails.

\--

The burning need to possess Haruka’s body in many ways throbbed insistently inside Rin’s chest. His tongue traveled over the bite marks now printed in Haruka’s sweet skin, yet Rin was not even close to be satisfied. Those warm hands traveling down his body, teasing him with toxic pleasure, send Rin’s last trace of sanity to sleep.

His tongue tasted Haruka’s collar bone, going up to meet with his ear as he left a saliva trace behind. He wanted to call his name, assure this was real but Rin was completely aware of their silent agreement. He grabbed Haruka by his shoulders and adjudged their positions, splashing icy water from the puddles beneath them with every step taken. They switched places, Haruka now with his back against the fence and Rin staring down at him with hungry eyes.

His shirt was now gone; laying close to Haruka’s on the wet floor. Their lips met once more as Rin proclaimed them as his, wrapping his arms around Haruka’s waist. There was no fabric between their chests, just their damp skins one against the other. Rin thrust his hips forward and met Haruka’s, moaning in their kiss. They were no boundaries, he wanted to take Haruka or be taken that night. It didn’t really matter to him anymore.

His body was calling Haruka’s, there was no way he could ever stop.

\--

Haru only had one bite mark thus far and as the shark’s tongue had slowly ran over his skin, a faint shiver ran through him. The next thing Haru knew, Rin had switched their positions. His skin was so sensitive to that soft warm tongue, his body literally shock with anticipation of where they were headed. The rain added to this, he could feel the cool drops slide down his skin, slow and wet. It was like the past when they used to fool around in the shower, he had never gotten the nerve to mention public sex in the rain. This was one of the reasons he was just gone in this moment. He wanted Rin, right here and right now.

Watching Rin rid himself of his shirt so fast, reminded him of when they were in high school and would have stripping contests. They were such idiots back then really but that was a memory that only brought joy and it in no way made him even ponder stopping.

Rin’s lips collided with his, demanding and passionate as he ever was, all the while thrusting his hips into Haru. The raven’s breath hitched as he felt such intimate contact, he pushed into Rin arching his back somewhat against the fence. He wrapped his arms around him and dug his nails into Rin’s back but not enough to pierce the skin.

He had to slow Rin down at least a little, so after a long sensuous kiss — he pulled away panting. He gazed into those eyes, his blue ones filled with yearning for the idiot he had always loved. He traced the skin along Rin’s chest slowly at first with his hands and then with his mouth. He kissed him starting at his chin and working his way down. He stopped at the grove of his hips and made his way back to Rin’s lips. Cupping the redhead’s face and kissing him firmly, his heart throbbing in his chest and his body heating up like he was in sauna. 

\--

Rin could feel Haruka’s hot breath blowing over his face, the smell of mint flooding his senses. For Rin, when their eyes met that time, time stopped and he was able to wonder how he had survived this long without those blue eyes staring back at him. A moan betrayed his lips when Haruka’s explored his chest. His fingers went stiff, closing themselves in a fist when Haruka’s mouth met his sensitive skin. He dug his nails into the palm of his hand to keep from speaking, from asking for more. Those kisses were just… too much.

The red-head started shaking, delighted by all the sensations running through his whole body. His lips were surprised by another wet kiss; he wrapped one arms around Haruka’s neck and bit his lower lip as payback. Haruka could be such a tease, leaving the shark thirsty for more.

‘Don’t make me beg, I need you!’, those were his thoughts as his other hand slid down Haruka’s chest, stopping on his belt . ‘If we take any longer… I might wake up from this dream.’

\--

He was impatient, he always had been - always tried to rush everything. Haru may need to show him, just how good it can he if he calms down a little and normally that might be his next move. But sometimes he would also bend to the redhead’s will. Right now he wasn’t thinking, nor did he want to be bothered with thoughts.

He wanted to just be lost with Rin, because this was a huge distraction from his tormented state of mind. He was running on a desirous adrenalin, he grinned when Rin bit his lip. One of his kinks when it came to this idiot, the teeth looked sharp but they didn’t pierce skin as easy as a real shark’s because Rin was a human. He nipped back at Rin’s lips and deepened their kiss. He tasted like he had been drinking the rain water do to exploring Rin’s skin with his mouth before.

He was very aware when Rin’s hand grazed over the skin of his damped chest and when he stopped. Haru brought their kiss to an end and looked him in the eye, daring him to continue. His eyes saying ‘What the hell are you waiting on?’

\--

The cold air hits his bare back. Rin watched with hungry eyes and he knew that release would have to suffice. Rin licked his lower lip, still tasting Haruka’s lips on his and feel his tongue in his mouth. ‘I’ve been waiting all these years just for you.’

Rin reached to Haruka’s zipper and shucked off his pants without taking his eyes from those deep blue ones he felt in love with.

\--

He groaned into the kiss and relished in Rin’s touch as the cool rain continued to fall over them. Those hands daring to go further and Haru just let it happen because he wanted Rin. He in a way was in just of an impassioned hurry as the one he still loves is.

His heart caught in his throat as he felt a strong pang of affection fill him. Only Rin brought such a high to his heart. He stepped out of his pants and never left that gaze, it was intense as hell and filled with want. Need. Raw desire.

He smiled at Rin and moved foreword kissing his lips teasingly as he reached for the front of his pants, awkwardly fumbling with the belt and zipper. He managed to get them undone and he slowly slide down Rin’s body with his own as he slipped those pants down his muscular thighs till they were at his ankles.

He slide against him all the way back up as well, placing heated kisses over that dampened skin. The sight before his eyes was breathtaking. When he finally arrived back at Rin’s subtle lips, he claimed them in a commanding kiss. His heart slammed in his chest and he panted harshly. He wanted this idiot.

\--


	3. Part 3

\--

How could Haruka remain so calm when their bodies were this close? He couldn’t help but wonder. Rin had always thought that Haruka was his perfect contrast, completely his opposite, just like Ying and Yang. While Rin wanted things now, Haruka went slow and his pace was killing Rin.

His pants were gone now. Rin closed his eyes deciding it was the best to let Haruka have it his way, and relaxed with every soft kiss placed on his skin. There was no way he was cold anymore, not with Haruka’s warm surrounding his body. Suddenly, there was no sound to be heard, Rin was completely lost in Haruka.

Their lips met once more and Rin finally understood it was for the best if he matched Haruka’s pace and extend their encounter. The longer it lasted, the longer he would forget that this was just a forbidden dream. Haruka… was not his, after all.

He wanted to break the kiss, to talk, to let Haruka know how much he still loved him. Yet… he remained silence and decided to let himself get lost in their kiss. Rin kissed Haruka a little harder, placing his hand on his waist. His other hand traveled slowly to Haru’s chest, pressing against his soft skin and feeling the heartbeat underneath it.

They were both wearing only underway, their soaked bodies hidden on that forgotten alley. It was just like a graphic love novel, and Rin fell in love with it. His hand on Haruka’s waist inserted the thumb inside his underwear, pulling from the elastic waistband and exposing some of that pail soft skin Rin missed all these years.

\--

Haru may appear calm to anyone on the outside looking in but he was filled with passion for the other male before him. He was just not in a huge hurry like Rin was. He didn’t want to just fuck Rin, he wanted to savor and forget his own reality. Pretend nothing had happened and simply relish in this moment. Drenched from the rain, but not cold due to the warm body pressed against his own.

The kiss was quite feverish and they were pressed so close together in the moment that Haru was well aware of Rin’s arousal not to mention his own as well. This was probably quite foolish on both of their parts. Surely they would be sick come tomorrow morning, but his normal thoughts were hushed by all the sweet kisses and caresses like Rin was something he needed to survive.

So as the redhead played with the waistband of Haru’s boxers, he slide his arms down Rin’s back and gripped his ass firmly as he pulled out of the kiss only to assault the redhead’s neck in a string of slow licks and nips. Choosing a spot to leave his mark on Rin, he wanted the redhead to remember this day. He wanted him to know that it was no dream. He also wanted to just mark him because in his own twisted logic, it made Rin belong to him even if only in this moment.

He finally moved forward as he placed his thumbs at the waist of Rin’s boxers and started sliding them down his body. They were clinging to his skin because of the dampness to them caused by the rain. His kisses moved from Rin neck and trailed down his chest with teasing licks. Ending up on his knees, he kissed the V of Rin’s hips before he stood back up once more claiming his lips, more demanding than ever. 

\--

Rin let out a soft moan when Haruka’s hand gripped his ass by surprise. His whole body shivered under Haruka’s touch, a foreign spark invaded veins right when those lips marked him wisely. He groaned and closed his eyes, feeling and memorizing how those lips felt against his skin. Just like a map, Rin would remember exactly every inch of his own skin where those lips have kissed so far.

A chill run down his spine once his boxers where pulled down and more skin was exposed. He felt his own cheeks blushing, yet it actually didn’t bother him. This was not the first time Haruka wondered down his body, he could still remember the first time they actually have seen each other’s nude body, but today… Today it was completely different. This was not about seeing each other completely naked. This was a reunion… Two bodies who wished to be one after so long.

A third moan joined the pouring rain over their shoulders. Rin felt his whole body tremble over that last kiss on his hip. He was quite surprised when Haruka’s lips silenced his with another demanding kiss, but Rin said nothing and kissed him back. Enjoying the lovely taste he could only find in Haruka’s mouth.

It was his turn now; Rin began to pull down Haruka’s boxers without ever breaking the kiss. Exposing more and more of that white skin he loved. He took those boxers slowly, teasing him just like he was teased.

\--

His throaty voice when he moaned was throwing Haru’s senses into a pleasant turmoil of yearning, knowing he was the cause of it. He remembered all those years ago, how they used to make love but this was somehow different in its own right. It had been so damn long since he had touched the other male. It was almost too sweet to believe it was real.

Haru wanted to drive Rin up the wall till be was begging but he could hopefully do that some other time. Maybe. He didn’t know. He wasn’t thinking with his head. More with his heart and his desire. Being like this with Rin was just something he needed. The sweetest distraction from his heartbreak. Rin was completely exposed at this point and Haru sighed with a strange contentment as Rin removed the last of the clothing from the dolphin’s body. He was now moving at Haru’s pace, he wasn’t trying to rush things anymore. This caused the raven’s heart to slam in his chest, Rin being so sensual was overwhelming to him. It was amazing and he remembered it happening before. Calming a heated shark so you can tease him and then please him was one of the dolphin’s favorite things.

He pulled out of the kiss and his stare fell on Rin, his eyes smiling and filled with longing, he softly ran his hands down Rin’s body as he nipped at his lips. They slowly fell lower till he cupped Rin’s ass and slipped a finger between the plump cheeks, making it known what he had in mind. Only then did he kiss the redhead once more, aggressive yet also soft somehow. A kiss that said, ‘let me take you…’

\--

A chill ran down his spine once he felt that foreign finger pressing between his cheeks. It’s been a long time since the last time they attempted something like this and it felt as if it was once again his first time. Even all this years they were not together, Rin felt strong enough to give his body to someone else that wasn’t Haruka.

Rin responded that kiss with the same aggressive passion Haruka’s lips sealed his. He wrapped his arms around the raven-head’s neck and pulled him closer, their chest now pressing against each other. He bit Haruka’s lower lip, his own knee pressing between Haruka’s legs as an answer to the unspoken question.

Yes, Rin wanted to be taken by Haruka. He wanted to remember how it felt to be ‘one’ with the one you love. He wanted to have a fresh memory to cherish in every lonely night after that day. There were no consequences that where worth to worry about, not now… not ever.

Take me.

He felt ready, full of desire. The only thing he could regret was leaving the condoms at home.

\--

Haru moaned harshly into the kiss when Rin bit his lip, they were both impassioned idiots not using their heads, not one bit. He knew he loved Rin with everything that he was and he had missed him and missed making love to him and vice versa.

Rin’s acceptance and his response to what Haru was doing to him, a torrent of fluid emotions and animalistic desire rose in the dolphin as his confidence grew. Rin pressing into him, encouraging him…it drove him forward. He nudged at the redhead and they slowly changed positions. Haru now pressing Rin’s body up against the fence. He slide another finger into Rin’s backside and moved at a slightly more vigorous speed. There wasn’t much he could do to prep him…but Rin seemed to be surrendering and he could always speak up if he wasn’t willing.

The only sounds were their faint breathing, the rain and Haru could hear his own heart pounding is his ears. With his free hand he slide it down Rin’s soaked skin till he reach his firm thigh and urge him with a small nudge to wrap his legs around him.

\--

Rin had been taken by surprise, his bare back now against the wet wood. It took him three seconds to register exactly what was now happening, until he felt those fingers moving inside him, teasing his insides. Soft moans escaped his lips; his eyes were now closed tightly, concentrating every inch of his body on Haruka’s work.

He felt unable to breath, panting harshly as those fingers picked up speed. His body became victim of several spams; it’s been a while since his body felt something of this sort. Rin wrapped a leg around Haruka right after the nudge, holding himself from the raven-head’s shoulders. His crimson eyes opened once more, staring down at those deep blue eyes.

Rin felt a knot on his throat, he was getting fucking emotional. There were so close, as close as he never thought they would ever be. His hand traveling down Haruka’s back like he never thought he would again. His entrance felt sore by the lack of preparation, but Rin didn’t even care. He wanted to feel Haruka completely; he wanted him to be rough, to use him for his own satisfaction.

“Fuck… me, Haru” he whispered into Haruka’s ear.

\--

Haru closed his eyes for the moment and concentrated on that voice, the voice of the one he loved and he was moaning because of Haruka. He felt so warm and tight around Haru’s fingers, just the thought of what was to come made his cock twitch. They were so close together that he could feel Rin’s body shudder slightly against him. The way he didn’t hesitate at all to throw a leg around Haru’s hips, it made the dolphin want to possess Rin that much more. He could hardly wait to feel him in the most intimate way possible, to be one with this precious person once more.

Those words caught him off guard but also drove him forward, the need to be with Rin - inside Rin, was profoundly overpowering his senses. His fingers slowly slipped out and he wasted no time grabbing a hold of his own cock and lining it up with Rin, as he stared back into those beautiful eyes and that sweet desired filled face. He could never resist this guy…

He slide in slowly at first, slow like he was teasing Rin…he continued being slow until he was in him to the hilt. It was so hot, so tight and god how he had missed this feeling. His heart slammed in his chest as he started to move, still slow but he would not be able to be slow for long. He wanted to fuck Rin into the damn fence till he was breathless and his legs were weak.

"Lock your legs around me…" He whispered into Rin’s ear before assaulting his mouth in passionately dominating kiss.

\--

Rin knew he isn’t going to be embarrassed about wanting it, not when he saw the desire across Haruka’s blue orbs. Haruka was dominating and gorgeous, making Rin wonder if the raven-head had been intimate with someone else on his absence. That thought was what made his throat tighter, those kind of thoughts were dangerous under this circumstances.

He threw his head back once he felt Haruka sliding deep inside him. This was not his first time, but the pain took him off-guard. “A-aah!” Escapes Rin’s mouth and his eyes scrunch together tightly. It felt strange, painful but, at the same time, Rin felt nothing but satisfaction. He was one with Haru. Just with Haru…

“Please. Deeper.” Rin whispers, not bothering to bite back a whimper. His two legs were now around Haruka’s waist, holding tightly. Rin could not control the shivers on his shoulders, trying to figure out if the pleasure he felt was the cause of them or maybe the heavy cold rain pouring over their bodies. “F-fas…t”

Their lips collide and Rin’s became clumsier, trying his best to kiss back. It was hard, so many things were happening at the same time: Their kiss, their bodies melting within each other, their first encounter in years, their rain, their clothes lying on the wet dirty floor…

Yet Rin knew he should focus his entire attention in Haruka’s body, in those lips claiming his. Rin moaned into his Haru’s mouth in response.

\--

Haruka groaned as he gazed upon Rin’s beautiful face, the way he was surrendering his body into their intimate act…the way he looked with a flushed face, wet hair and moaning like he was… How was Haruka going to forget this? How is he going to not want to fall into bed every time he sees him? It was all too sweetly intimate but he couldn’t stop at this point.. He was too far gone into the moment for that and god Rin felt so damn good.

"Fuck…Riiin…" Haru belted out in a husky grunt and he damn near lost it when Rin spoke, but he obliged because he wanted to be deeper if that was possible and he wanted to lose control… so he did, he gripped Rin’s thighs and thrust deeper into him, mercilessly not holding back at all. Speeding up with each stroke as he felt Rin’s tight heat clinch around his cock. Oh god… he bit Rin’s lip as they kissed, he had to distract himself a little. He wanted this to last and he never could get enough of Rin. He loved him so damn much and he was kidding himself as he lied to his foolish heart… Convinced they were over…

Fucking Rin distracted him from all the pain, from all the shit he had gone through since they faded apart.. How did it even happen? It baffled him but at the moment he wasn’t thinking about his broken heart. He wasn’t thinking at all. He was just an impassioned idiot who had lost himself in the arms of the person, the one person he could never resist. If Rin only knew what power he really held over Haru’s heart… There could never be anyone else.

Rin’s bare, damp skin against his, his hot wet mouth as he kissed Haru back passionately… In a way Haru felt like he never wanted to stop, in a way he knew that once this was over… he was going to go back into his depressed state but it was at the very back if his mind.

Being intimate with Rin, being one with this precious person. Without realizing it a tear was falling from his face… Thank god the rain was there to shield it.

\--

This was way too much; his body already adjusted to Haruka’s member, accepting him already as part of Rin. The red-head was panting, his unfocused eyes staring up at Haru. He noticed a different shade of blue on those orbs now surrounded by emotions he couldn’t figure out, as if there was an untold story waiting to be heard.

Raindrops came together on his red lashes, forcing him to blink and close his eyes. Rin sucked Haruka’s lower lip before diving in for another deep, wet kiss.

His whole mind went blank once Rin felt how Haruka’s member was thrusting against his sweet spot, over and over. “H-Haru, there!” It was the last straw, there was too much pleasure and Rin felt like if he was going to die in Haruka’s hands. His body trembled and his thighs tensed right away, followed by the rest of his body. “Haruka! Haru!” he moaned not aware of the saliva that was rolling down his chin. 

Rin feared this was coming to an end. His body couldn’t hold up all this pleasure any longer, he could feel his manhood getting hotter within each second, yet Rin tried to make this last at least a couple of seconds longer. Rin wasn’t ready to let him go, he wasn’t ready to face the real world again… not yet, not without Haruka.

“A-ah…!” Rin moaned. “I’m… I’m so fucking close!”

\--

The pleasure was growing in him and Haru was not going to be able to fight it much longer, it just felt too good. His body relished in this moment and savored it, he wanted to remember it because he was afraid it was the last time he would make love like this to his ex. The one who would never leave his heart. He fit inside him like a glove, like they were meant to be together and meant to be this intimate.

Time almost stood still… and he knew he would never see the rain quite the same way again. As he continued his vigorously impassioned thrusting into Rin, he could feel the redhead’s body soft shaking and his tightness squeezing against his cock. God, he could not take much more of this… Rin was yelling as if Haru had found just the right spot. So he increased his rhythm and hammered into Rin rougher than ever making sure to hit that spot or try at least. He wanted Rin to feel so good that his eyes would roll back in his head. He had always loved making the redhead feel pleasure.

He felt Rin’s hot hard cock bumping into him as he thrust in and out of the redhead. He moved one of his hands and got a firm grip as he began to stroke it in long swift movements. He loved the feel of it in his hand, the soft skin yet so hard beneath. Then Rin was yelling about being so close. Haru felt a sly smile as he hope he was satisfying his lover. He leaned in and thrust with all the force he could muster and kissed those sweet lips softly as he did so. His heart racing and his breath a heaving pant as he himself was about to lose it completely.

\--

It was as if Haruka knew Rin’s body more like he did, stroking him and thrusting right on his sweet spot. The intense pleasure was making it impossible to think. The pleasure shocks all across his body and suddenly it’s hard to breathe.

“H-Haru…! A-ahh!”

He wrapped his arms tightly around the raven-head’s body and pulled him close just to avoid the floor. He bucked his hips, following Haruka’s rhythm, Rin hit his limit first. He came, feeling the hot stickiness all over his bare stomach. He had never felt extremely alive and yet so miserable in Haruka’s arms.

They were almost done; their encounter was almost over…

Rin would have to pretend this never happened, to pretend… he didn’t love Haruka when he couldn’t. Rin knew that once this was over, he would have to lock all his feelings inside his chest and try to leave a life without Haruka.

“Haru…”

\--

His heart swelled because making love to Rin had reminded him just how much he loved him. The whole thing was becoming very bitter sweet. As he was making his final thrusts into Rin, he gasped so harshly when the redhead moved with him. He couldn’t handle that much and seeing Rin lose it, feeling it coat his skin and then be washed away from the rain pouring down over them…

He felt a hot surge wash over his middle as he finally reached his own climax and he came deep inside of Rin. He could feel Rin’s body shuddering all around him. Panting harshly, he let out a loud sultry moan of Rin’s name before reluctantly pulling out and releasing those sweet thighs from his grip.

Though their lovemaking was over, he wanted to kiss him, in the rain…one last time. He cupped Rin’s face like it was the most precious thing he had ever touched and gave him a calmer, sweeter kiss.

As he kissed him, his sorrow was getting the better of him, his heart filling slowly with pain as he realized that this may be the last kiss and the last encounter. The very last moment of intimacy with Rin. Bittersweet indeed.

\--

Rin could feel Haruka’s sweet fluids filling him from the inside, dripping from his entrance leaving his body completely exhausted. His legs where sore from holding them around Haru the whole time, he knew that by tomorrow that pain was going to be the reminder that his own body was no longer his, it was now and forever was going to be Haruka’s.

And it hit him, the entire situation and their possible consequences came all over Rin’s shoulders. The emotions, the rushed decisions, the pain and all what he tried to ignore during the last half-hour was now swirling inside his head. What they had just done was completely wrong, what they had just done was going to be the reason of their own destruction.

Rin felt how the guilt was starting to eat his chest, how his entire body began shaking as regret took all over his mind. What Haruka and Rin just did had been reckless and Rin knew that now that he had been able to taste Haruka once more, it was going to be harder to let him go.

But then… those lips were pressed against his once more time.

Rin froze for a moment, unable to answer the kiss that was bringing him back to life. He wanted to let himself believe in happy endings and closed his eyes just to kiss Haruka back. This kiss was completely different, full of sweetness and consolation, as if Haruka didn’t want to let him go just as much as Rin wanted to stay.

Just when Rin was about to let himself go once more… his cellphone rang and broke their moment abruptly. The red-head broke the kiss, staring at Haruka’s face for nearly five seconds and then looking away, finding his phone close to his discarded clothes.

He didn’t know why he didn’t hesitate to answer the phone, maybe he was too nervous to actually talk about what just happened or maybe he was just not ready.

“Hello?” Pause. “Gou?”

\--

The way he kissed back was only more bitter-sweetness and Haru realized they had made the whole situation worse as he heard that phone ring and the kiss came to an end. He could not breath for the few seconds that Rin’s eyes stayed on his and his heart would not stop pounding or aching.

As the other boy moved away to answer his phone, he was facing away from Haru. The dolphin slowly picked his clothes up off the damp ground as the rain still continued to fall overhead. He quietly dressed himself as quickly as he could. He had to get away before he fell back into those arms all over again.

As he walked away, the rain was not the only reason his face was wet. His tears he had held back as to not let Rin see, finally drained from his eyes as he slowly dragged his feet. Not wishing to go home but more wishing the ground would open up and swallow him whole.

He was still so in love. God damn it.

\--


	4. Part 4

As the phone call kept going, Rin’s body began shaking. Gou kept talking over the phone while Rin’s mind was not even processing any of her words. His mind was tangled in wild thoughts and, once he became aware that Haruka had been extremely quit, he looked over his shoulder.

Haruka was gone.

His heart ached painfully inside his chest as realization hit him hard. Rin’s body became colder than ice, frozen like he never thought it possible. He had been left alone, naked… on an unknown ally that rainy night. There was no longer such thing as pride inside his heart. His purple lips began shaking and the first tears began falling down those sad crimson eyes.

Gou’s voice grew up concerned and Rin realized his sobs had been louder than he would ever allow them to be. Assuring his little sister that everything was alright and that he would be home soon, he hang up the phone and picked his soaked clothes. He got dressed, yet his soul felt entirely naked, vulnerable.

Before leaving the dark alley, Rin noticed Haruka’s groceries scattered across the dirty floor. He bit his lower lip and remembered how this whole encounter started. That night, Rin walked home with nothing else inside his mind but Haruka.

\--

When he arrived home after what felt like an eternity, he backed himself into the door and fell the ground. As sweet as that was, it had been a huge mistake. If he was miserable before, he was even more so now.

The pain in his chest was all consuming at this moment and his eyes refused to dry up. He sat there with his head in his hands and Rin refused to leave his mind. He could still feel his presence lingering on his body.

His mind raced with endless questions about the past and how could he feel so much for someone when they fell apart so easily back then. Why hadn’t they tried harder. Why did he have to still be so in love with him? Why couldn’t he just get over it?

As that week past, he came down with a cold thanks to the rain they had made love in. Another constant reminder of Rin, great.

\--

It had already been one week after their last encounter and, ever since then, Rin was never himself anymore. Making up excuses, he postponed the job hunting and wasted his days and nights locked inside his room away from any human contact. His mother and sister where worried, yet both knew how Rin worked and decided to let him be.

The marks on his neck where still there, fading slowly on his skin. He could still remember Haruka’s lips on him, how he touched him as he marked him as his. Rin closed his eyes and breathed in. There was no use on holding those memories, yet… Rin couldn’t spend a single second without thinking on kissing those lips again.

He was hurt, but after kissing Haruka, he had never felt so alive.

That night it rained again and Rin couldn’t even remember who thought it was a good idea to organize a reunion. He never kept in touch with anybody from Iwatobi High or Samezuka after he broke up with Haruka, he knew it was going to be quite awkward to see them after all this time. Gou insisted and he ended up agreeing, part of him hopping on meeting with Haruka once more.

Under the same umbrella, Rin walked his sister to Makoto’s new apartment. His crimson eyes kept staring at the raindrops falling from the sky and all these memories surrounded his thoughts. He stopped, Gou stared at him in confusion as he extended his hand out of the umbrella. The raindrops fell on his hand and Rin could swear it was as if he could feel Haruka fingertips traveling on his wet skin like last time.

He sighed and ignored his sister’s curious eyes on him. They arrived to their destination in no time, greeted by his old friends and making his way in.

\--

Haru was over his cold by the time the week was up, he had almost forgot about the reunion. However, Nagisa had called and reminded him. He sighed, he wanted to go on one hand, but on the other, he was scared to see Rin again.

Ever since that night in the rain, it refused to leave his mind. He touched his finger to his lips. He could close his eyes and so easily recall what those kisses had felt like. He sighed, he wanted to forget it all but that was really just his head lying to his heart. He was trying to shut himself off but it wasn’t working.

So if he saw Rin again, he was afraid that that night would repeat itself all over again. He couldn’t resist him. He knew it, yet here he was walking in the rain to the reunion. The rain…how it made it that much worse. The last time it rained was when they were so intimate. Haru sighed.

He entered Makoto’s, he hardly came here anymore. Everyone was already seated around the table, he took a seat that ended up being down away from Rin. However, he had a perfect view of him out of the corner of his eye.

God, he looked really good. Haru felt his heart swell and his insides heat up. He had better avoid him or….

\--

Rin was awfully quiet that night. He was way different from how everybody else in that room remembered him from high school, he didn’t even care. The whole room felt so alive, each of his old friends smiling and sharing old stories while Rin couldn’t stop himself from staring at Haruka by the corner of his eyes.

Yes, he had been hoping on meeting with Haruka once more at this reunion but Rin didn’t actually expected it to really happen. Rin’s heart was on fire, beating so hard against his chest he felt it was going to pop out and hit somebody in the face at certain point. Haruka was so quiet, so mysterious like he had always been, and Rin really wished he could steal a glance from those blue eyes he was so in love with.

Nagisa poked one of Rin’s hickeys and the red-head jumped on his chair. He covered that spot quickly with one hand and glared at the blond. “What’s the big deal, Nagisa?!”

But Nagisa just flashed a grin and pointed out the love marks Rin had all over his neck. The red-head blushed right away and his whole world stopped for a brief moment. Was Nagisa really bringing that topic to the table? His crimson eyes wondered slowly to Haruka before he hear Gou giggling. She added how she first saw those marks ever since last week but decided not to say a thing because her older brother was so moody.

“Oh, shut up!” Rin replied quite annoyed and glared back at his sister. This was awkward, talking in front of Haruka about the marks he had left on his body. “What I do with my freaking body is none of your business!”

\--

Despite the fact that he was not in a cheerful mood, the commotion caused by Nagisa and Kou to Rin, well he couldn’t help but softly smile to himself. As much as he was sitting here with regrets, it was also like he was totally not sorry that it had happened and he would not take it back.

His eyes fell on Rin without being able to stop himself, he was so red and he always looked so good like that. All flustered. Haruka closed his eyes and pictured that night in his head. Maybe a little too long because someone made a comment.

"I was just remembering how nice the rain was last week…"

No one knew what he was referring to of course, he just got stares and no one was surprised because they knew Haru was awkward and quirky at times when it came to matters involving water.

He looked again across the table at Rin, somehow it felt safe with others around them and he made a slight face at the redhead as he held up the same two fingers he had used on Rin and made sure no one was looking as he licked some salt off his hand. Was it on purpose? Maybe.

\--

Those words took Rin by surprise, his heart skipped a beat as a warm feeling spread inside his chest. His eyes quickly met Haruka across the table for the first time that night, admiring how handsome he looked on those neat clothes he was wearing. Deep inside his mind, Rin allowed himself to think he liked Haruka better when he was not wearing anything.

Rin licked his lips unconsciously; he could feel his whole body getting hotter just by listening to Haru’s voice. He tried to hold himself, just staring at Haruka while his mind kept repeating over and over the memories of their last encounter under the rain.

“Yeah, it rained quite much and I forgot my umbrella at home.” Rin heard himself speak. When did he even open his mouth? “I ended up pretty… wet.”

Those words came out by themselves but Rin couldn’t care less. Nobody else in that table actually understood what was really happening between those former rivals. Both talking between the lines in a coded language no one could even break down.

Just watching Haruka lick those fingers like he did made Rin hold his breathe unable to process what was actually happening. He had to look away, his pants suddenly felt tighter that before. What was this all about? Were they actually flirting?

\--

Haru’s gaze was locked with those red hues as Rin spoke, his heart sped up with each word. What had come over him? It turns out Nagisa had spiked the punch but Haru wasn’t aware of it. His inhibitions had been altered but only a little, it was as if the combination of that and his warm friends around him that put him at ease.

"Wet huh? I was completely drenched…" Haru grazed his hand over his own neck, subtle to draw Rin’s attention. Rin wasn’t the only one who had been marked, the raven had been looking at what the redhead had done, every day since then as he brushed his teeth in the mornings. He had a hickey, a very dark one on one side of his neck. It was a miracle no one had noticed it.

At this moment, the two may be paying a little too much attention to each other, their friends hadn’t noticed for now. But only after Haru had seen the look in Rin’s eyes after he had licked his fingers, he looked uncomfortable and had looked away. The raven grinned, had he had the kind of effect he was trying to? There was something about teasing Rin across the crowded room.

"Hey, Haru-chan!" His eyes were forced to leave Rin to talk to Nagisa for a while, but he still stole a glance now and then. After some time, Haru turned his attention back to Rin, why is it that I cannot stop looking at you or thinking about you?

He found himself slightly frustrated because it kept reminding him of their little charade from the other day, those marks on Rin’s neck, a constant reminder and he looked so good. Haru was sure that he smelled that way as well. He had to avoid him if possible, it was safer to not repeat the other night…

\--

Haruka’s glance upon his own neck made Rin notice the hickeys and bites he had left upon that pale skin. Rin could still remember the taste of that skin, his ultimate addiction, and bit his lower lip as he wished to taste it once again.

Suddenly the idea of flirting with Haruka made him feel nauseous, annoyed and uneasy. Why in the world where they flirting if they were and would never be more than nothing? It was as if he was teasing himself on eating his favorite dish knowing he would never be able to eat it again. Rin felt a knot being tied inside his stomach.

It seemed that his sister noticed something was wrong with her brother because she touched his shoulder and gave him a worried look. Rin forced a smile on his lips and shook his head, denying any material to worry his sister.

Slowly, his eyes went back to Haruka and a long sigh escaped his lips. This was bad…

He wanted Haruka back so badly…

\--

Rin started looking uneasy in a way and this brought Haru back to reality. Right, they were no more. That night had been a fluke, it shouldn’t have happened. Yet he also would never take it back, it had been too sweet and it had distracted him better than anything else could,

He twirled his fork as he started to over think once more and it brought the old stress back to his shoulders, a huge weight that seemed to never be evaded.

He got up to leave the room, “I need some air…” He didn’t venture outside because that rain would not help him forget. He dragged his feet as he headed down a lone hallway that lead to the restroom.

Once inside he washed his face and stared at the marks on his skin, why did he want to be with him like that again. They had never shared such a raw desire when they were together… Somehow it was as if they both had just lost their minds….

He left the restroom and started back down the hallway. He just felt so lonesome in this moment.

\--

The entire table became silent upon Haruka’s departure, questioning looks were exchanged between all the guests, yet it was Makoto who spoke this time explaining that Haruka had always been like that. Haruka had always been a loner, a person that enjoyed his time alone rather than share it with too much people. Everyone agreed to that statement and the party continued… but not for Rin.

Victim of an overthinking mind, Rin hesitated on his places in silence, lost in his own thoughts. Where had Haruka gone? And how long was he going to take there? Should he follow him? Should he search for the answers that where tormenting him?

Rin couldn’t remember the very second when he stood from the table and left the room without a word to the curious eyes on him. He went after Haruka, closing the living room door to give themselves more privacy.

There he found Haruka, standing at the other end of the hallway. Rin locked his eyes on Haruka’s.

\--

The hallway was soon felt as if all the air was sucked out of it, as he was suddenly there. Rin at the end of the other end of the hallway. Those eyes felt like they were burning into Haruka.

He just froze there for a moment and he couldn’t seem to find his own voice, as if it had fled the situation and left him behind to fend without it.

In his now complete nervousness, he ran a hand through his hair and sighed heavily. His eyes not leaving Rin’s and he heart betraying him as it beat too hard in his chest. A painful ache that only this guy could make him feel.

He didn’t run but he also stayed put not getting any closer. He swallowed hard and his lips parted to speak but nothing came out.

\--

The sound of the rain echoed through the dark hallway. Always there, following them as their own background music, the soundtrack song for a love unable to fade away. Rin stood there, frozen in his spot, eyes on deep blue.

There were so many things he wanted to say, so many questions he wanted to ask, but he couldn’t find his own voice. Deep inside, he was afraid of breaking this silence between them and force themselves to face a side of reality that maybe they were not ready to face.

Would it be worth it? Remain in silence, overthink, assume the answers he would have and say nothing about the pain that drowned his own heart? Rin took a deep breathe, walking forward and taking the silent path he always took when Haruka was involved.

Maybe he should keep assuming; that was one of the things he was good at, assuming. He rather stay quiet, keep his feelings locked inside his chest and pretend he was ok.

And so, Rin broke the distance between them. He didn’t waste any time and pinned Haruka up against the wall. His hands come to rest on Haruka’s hips, leaning his forehead on his, staring down at him for brief seconds until he stole a kiss from those lips he wished were his.

\--

All he could hear as he stood there was his own heart, betraying him because every beat was for Rin. The closer Rin got, the more anticipation grew, he didn’t try to move or attempt to get away. It was as if he knew or maybe he just hoped.

Those eyes were burning into him as he stood there and watched Rin move, he closed his eyes again as he recalled once more what happened the last time it rained.

He opened his eyes once more and Rin was almost all the way to him, his breath hitched and he felt his heart stop for a moment.

How he wished to kiss those lips and hold that body against his again, His eyes slowly became half lidded as Rin took action.

He just surrendered it was the only thing he wanted for now, to just be like this with Rin. The way he just pressed his forehead to Haru’s at first, Rin was such a sensual being in this moment. So sweetly intimate and he just knew how to push Haru’s buttons like no one else ever could or would.

He felt like putty as he was kissed melting into the ground as it was too sweet and too warm and too wet. It was perfect, just like Rin.

\--

He knew this would happen, the second he tasted those lips once more would get him falling completely for everything about Haruka all over again. Those lips tasted better than the finest and rarest fruit in the entirely world. Haruka had always smelled so good; so forbidden and addicting.

Just by kissing Haruka again Rin had enough to realize the huge mistake he had just done. He felt like choking but he was not strong enough to break the kiss and stop himself. Within seconds, the kiss became more intense and passionate; Rin was kissing him with all the locked emotions flowing inside his chest.

It was hurting him. This love he felt for Haruka was way too big, too rich and true. It couldn’t be tamed, it was impossible to ignore and shut down. He cupped Haruka’s face when it happened. Their lips were still pressed together in that sweet kiss when Rin felt his own tears falling down his cheeks. It was too much; Rin loved Haruka just… too much to ignore it.

He broke down. The kiss came to an end when Rin pressed his hands on Haruka’s shoulder and pushed him back.

“Fuck.” He whispered. “What the fuck are we doing…?!”

He thought he could play this game, he thought it would be easy to fool Haruka… to fool himself and pretend he could kiss those lips without getting hurt in the process, he was just another fool. 

Rin was absolutely not ready to face Haruka, yet… this emotions left him no choice.

\--

This kiss was different than the others, with this kiss… somehow Rin was kissing him like he was something delicate and precious that he wanted to treasure. And it became so passionate that Haru thought he might sink into the wall. Who taught this guy to kiss so well? He was nearly senseless by the time Rin pulled away.

But before Rin puled away, the kiss was wet from Rin’s tears, Haru’s eyes flew open and took in that site. Rin had not been okay after all… that was plain to see on his face now…

He spoke and Haru’s heart went out to him. What were they doing was a good question, a question Haru wasn’t sure how to answer. He stared at Rin for the longest moment as he tried to find the right words to say. He was bad at this, getting across to Rin. At least when he desperately needed to… he hoped to convey his feelings but nothing came out.

Why is it? Why is it that he has no trouble being intimate with Rin but when it comes time to do something, really do something about what once was. He keeps fucking up?

"I don’t know…except it was distracting me from the pain of the past." I still love you, damn it all.

\--

Rin felt a lump in his throat and then the salty taste of his tears resting on his cracked lips. Every breath felt like walking on a bed of broken glass. Why did he always end up crying in front of Haruka? Rin hated himself, always showing his weak side to the person he loved. Always showing his true colors to Haruka, when he was supposed to show him how better he was without him. It never worked; he could never hide his true feelings to Haru for so long.

“Pain from the past?” He whispered, hands still pressing against Haruka’s shoulder. “What the… hell are you talking about?”

He licked his chapped lips and stared down at Haruka, trying to ignore the tears that blocked his vision. “Why is it always so damn complicated to understand you, Haru?! I wanna know!”

\--

And there it is, so all he had managed to do so far was just confused Rin. Rin didn’t understand that Haru’s pain from the past was losing Rin. That Haru had never gotten over him.

He didn’t want to cry in front of Rin, the rain had been his shield that night and it had helped him hide this from the redhead. He scanned that face and his eyes swayed, heavy with emotions.

"You. Okay? Do you think I got over us? I never did….."

He was ready to walk away again but something stopped him.

"How…how —" have you been all this time? Have you suffered too?

\--

Rin was shocked, to say the least, with what he heard three seconds earlier. His heart skipped a beat as he finally processed what those lips had just revealed. “You… you are killing me, Haru.” Rin responded, the knot in his throat tighter than before. He had never seen so many emotions flowing inside Haruka’s deep blue orbs. “How the fuck do you think I feel? I’ve tried to stop loving you but, damn it, I just can’t do it!”

Rin felt insulted, annoyed by Haruka’s lack of communication skills. He was not letting him go, not this time. Rin needed answers, he would continue with his sleepless nights if they just walked away. “If I was so damn special back then, then why the hell won’t you break down and tell me?!”

\--

This was frustrating. So frustrating. Why had his emotions slipped out? Why did he have to end up with his heart on a ledge? It was safer to bottle it up, wasn’t it? It was safer to hide in his shell and not reveal how he really felt. How he had always felt.

Why did it ever have to fall apart in the first place? If Rin supposedly loved him so much and vice versa. Was it really all that strong if they can drift apart like they did?

Haruka’s head and heart were both a complete mess. His confusion was overwhelming and so bothersome. He chewed at the inside of his lip as he listened to everything Rin said.

"Do you think its so easy to just tell you? I’m so fucking scared of being hurt all over again okay? If we can drift apart then, what is going to hold us together now? I loved you back then and I STILL love you now. I can’t even be happy most of the time. I am so fucking pathetic. Dwelling on the past…." Haru grabbed his own bangs and slide down the wall, trying his damnedest to not cry.

"I want to be with you again…but I am just fucking scared." His voice was weak and it cracked, his face became wet as a tear finally appeared. He lowered his head to hide it from Rin.

\--

 

Rin’s mouth went dry; no words were able to describe the uneasiness that throbbed inside his chest. He had never seen such frustrations blurring Haruka’s vision, and there was something so wrong in the way the raven seemed so… unprotected as he slide down to the floor.

The words that came out from those lips seemed as his own; sharing the same fears and anxieties that had haunted him for years. “What… are you talking about?” Rin managed to say, yet he couldn’t even get a grasp of himself. “I don’t get it.”

Rin was incapable of doing anything but looking on in shock, he had never seen Haruka cry before. How come his tears hurt this much?

He fell on his knees in front of Haruka, his heart was beating so hard against his chest it hurt. For how long had he dreamed to hear Haruka whisper ‘I love you’ once more? It seemed so incredible and yet…

“Haru…” Rin’s voice trembled. “Y-you can’t be serious, you stopped loving me ever… ever since I left Iwatobi. Remember?”

\--

He wiped his tears but stayed seated on the floor against the wall, He could hear Rin speaking and he closed his eyes and breathed in deep. “Rin…” He looked up at the kneeling boy in front of him. “Don’t tell me how I feel. Only I know how I feel. What you assume is NOT how I feel. I LOVE YOU AND I NEVER STOPPED. Okay?” He didn’t yell but his tone was firm, yet his voice was filled with his pain.

He studied that face and he wanted to run into those arms but everything was just one big mess. One huge disaster. Was it even possible to phantom the idea of being together anymore? Was it really possible? He had to be kidding himself to even think it.

"Do you think I made love to you the other day only because of my own lust? I wanted to feel you again because I love you. For the first time in so long, I forgot my pain. I got lost in you and your body…"

\--

 

He was right; Rin had lived a life of assuming and never asking. Afraid of rejection and disillusion. Maybe… he was the one to blame.

Those words coming out of Haruka’s lips were meant to be a sin. How was he able to talk about their encounter under the rain so casually? Just listening to those words full with passion, full with honestly and frustration at the same time made Rin’s lips shiver.

“H-Haru…” he whispered, yet his head was such a mess that he couldn’t even fix his own thoughts. “Do… do you think I would be able to give my body to someone else that wasn’t you?”

His hands trembled, approaching to Haruka and cupping his face gently with them. Crimson eyes clouded with tears once more. “I’ve been so fucking in love with you all these years it constantly suffocates me.”

\--

Haru looked at him, really looked at him and answered his question. “Do you think I wanna touch anyone or do those kind of things with anyone if it isn’t you? It HAS to be you.”

He placed his hands over the ones cupping his face as he saw the tears in Rin’s eyes. ‘No, don’t cry Rin…’ His heart went out to the redhead and he brushed his thumb over one of the hands touching his face.

"I never stopped loving you either. I don’t think its possible…" Its just apart of who I am and it has been since the first time you smiled at me.

His hands moved to gently wipe Rin’s tears as he scanned his face and desired so bad to pull Rin into his arms and just hold him. Just comfort Rin, but he didn’t do it. He was still a little scared but somehow it wasn’t as bad as before.

It seems things are more mutual than Haru realized, Rin had not moved on, same as Haru. Rin was still in love. Same. Rin was as much of a mess as Haru or maybe more…he didn’t know.

"I want to hold you…."

\--

Rin felt those fingertips brushing against his cheek, pulling out the emotions that he kept locked in his heart for so many years. Haruka’s words began healing the invisible wounds around his neck, on his heart, allowing him to breathe once more.

He didn’t have to be told twice. Rin went straight to Haru and hugged him dearly, pressing him as much as he could against his chest. He closed his eyes tightly. Rin finally started to believe life couldn’t be cruel all the time.

“Then hold me.” He added quietly. “I am afraid as well, but I promise you I won’t let you go again.”

His lips met Haruka’s neck, dropping small kisses all over that pale skin until Rin rested his chin on his shoulder instead. How many years have they wasted? How many years have Rin gone through assuming Haruka’s feelings and running away? “I’m sorry, so sorry…” he sobbed. “I always end up fucking everything up. I hurt you…”

\--

He felt a sense of relief as those arms wrapped him in a comforting hug. Was everything going to be okay now? Was this what it took to bandage what they had together or would they still fuck up? The longer he hugged Rin, the less worry he had.

He embraced him in return and rubbed his back with one hand, he shivered at the light kisses to his neck. Haru sighed and closed his eyes, the gentleness of these arms and Rin in general was something he needed. He couldn’t help it, he loved him more than ever before if that was possible.

"No need to apologize Rin." It was not all Rin’s fault, the had both been idiots all this time. "I’m sorry too. I wish we had never faded…." But really that love was always there, they may have faded apart for awhile, but their love it seems always burned.

Haru’s heart was starting to heal, after so long. He at this moment, he just wanted to hold Rin for awhile. He leaned into Rin a little more and for the first time in a long tine, his sigh was filled with happiness as it left his lips.

"I just love you…."

\--

This felt just right, and Rin couldn’t do anything but flash the most honest smile he ever had in the past years. “I wish I hadn’t given up so easily back then.” Relaxed in that hug, Rin closed his eyes feeling completely reassured. Being in love never felt so right; finally his heart was no longer in pain. “I love you too, idiot. You have no idea.”

Rin wiped the tears that were still falling from his cheek with his free hand, his other arm still around Haruka, keeping him close.

He caressed his raven hair, his fingers combing those silky locks. Rin lips met Haruka’s nose, locking his gaze on Haruka’s orbs. “There’s lot of things we need to talk about, though. No more miscommunications, we need to let it all out.” He assured, noticing how bright Haru’s eyes had suddenly become. “Wanna… skip the rest of the party and go somewhere else?”

\--

He closed his eyes as his nose was kissed and sighed as his heart felt even lighter, but was it really this easy to resolved years of heartache? Rin was right, they needed to talk and they needed to be more open with each other. His eyes slowly opened and he gazed at the beautiful scarlets that were filled with warmth.

"Lets go to my place."

He gave the redhead a quick hug before standing up and stretching lightly. How was it that it seemed so simple now? Too simple. Yet he still felt happy even if he did have a small doubt buried in the depths of his heart. Perhaps, love really was worth risking the pain because nothing was sweeter than being in the arms of the person he loves.


End file.
